Dream... Dream...

What's in a dream? During pregnancy, a lot!

First you give birth to... your husband. Then you make a speedy getaway (in a Mack truck!). Finally, you're engulfed in a tidal wave.
Some dream images typically appear at certain stages of pregnancy. To help you figure out what your dreams might be telling you, read on.

Anxiety about birth and motherhood
"I give birth to a full-grown child. He is like a miniature adult, dressed like an adult, and walking and talking like an adult."

Many first-time mothers, when they discover they have conceived, dream of giving birth to a fully mature baby or grown child. Perhaps an older baby or child seems less threatening than a fragile newborn to the inexperienced mother.

Early in pregnancy, first-time moms rarely know much about the childbirth experience; they often feel apprehensive. The combination of hopes for an easy delivery and incomplete understanding of the actual process leads to dreams of the baby "popping out" or simply appearing.

Self-consciousness about your changing body
"I am driving a car. At the same time I carry a spare tire around my waist."

A woman's feelings about her body may either improve or deteriorate during pregnancy. In this dream it was obvious that the "spare tire" was my expanding midsection. Driving a vehicle is often a metaphor for the way the dreamer is moving through life at the moment; with the spare tire, my movement was rather clumsy. Pregnant women frequently picture themselves driving trucks, buses, or other vehicles that are more difficult to maneuver than cars in their dreams — reflecting their perception of awkward movement.

Researchers who have studied pregnant women's dreams observe frequent references to buildings in them, from simple rooms to soaring skyscrapers. The dream buildings are often places where things are made, such as a factory or a shipyard, probably paralleling the "making" of a baby that is taking place inside the woman's body. Perhaps pregnant women dream about buildings because they are hypersensitive to their "enlarging inner space." Indeed, the type of building pictured in the woman's dreams may increase in size as her pregnancy progresses; one researcher found that dream buildings became larger and more complex the closer the woman was to term; skyscrapers were especially common.

Awareness of your amniotic fluid
"I'm in a region, possibly a tropical rainforest. I learn that the projected rainfall is 700 inches! I'm amazed."

From goldfish bowls to family wash to swelling oceans, a pregnant woman's dreams refer to water throughout her pregnancy. A mother-to-be will often find herself swimming in her first-trimester dreams. Where animals appear in first-trimester dreams, they are often aquatic creatures such as tadpoles and fish. This water in her dreams possibly depicts an awareness of the water gathering in her womb. Water in dreams may take on a dramatic form as pregnancy progresses.

Toward her due date, a pregnant woman is more likely to dream of water as a symbol of the "breaking waters" that announce imminent childbirth. One woman dreamt at the end of her second trimester of carrying a heavy schoolbag when big ocean waves rose and endangered her. We begin our lives as water creatures, suspended in a sea of liquid within our mother's womb. A pregnant woman is drinking fluids for two, herself and her baby. Small wonder that her dreams overflow with images of water.

You give birth to a litter of kittens. Then you see your high school boyfriend. Now you're trying to make a quick getaway — but you have too many bags to carry by yourself.

Curiosity about the mother-baby connection
"While visiting Mother, I sit by myself in her living room. Near me on a chair is a pet of hers, a gibbonlike creature. I keep my distance from him, afraid he might bite. He climbs around on the furniture, and nibbles on some squash in a hanging basket."

During the second trimester, a pregnant woman's dreams contain animals that are more baby-like, such as pups, chicks, and kittens. Depending upon her attitude toward the pregnancy, her mate, and her situation, the animal may be either threatening or lovable. The dream above suggests she felt some ambivalence about the effect of the strange new creature coming into her life. Would its presence be destructive?

The presence of friendly animals — rare and charming creatures in dreams — is generally thought to represent a good relationship between the dreamer and his or her instincts. In the dreams of many pregnant women, animals are frequently cuddly and cute. Your feeling about the animal or baby reveals something about your attitude at the time of the dream.



You're chasing a child whose face remains hidden from you. Suddenly, she turns and you see that she's inherited your partner's green eyes. Next, she opens her mouth to speak and tells you her name.

Predicting your baby's sex
"I am running through a meadow and feeling ecstatic. It is an idyllic scene — my dream of motherhood. I wear a flowing gown. I can see the back of my child skipping before me happily. I can't tell from the back whether it is a boy or a girl. I always want to know, but it is usually masked in my dreams."

Sometimes a pregnant mother's dreams about the sex of her child are vague. Other times, mothers feel quite certain of the sex of their forthcoming child based upon their dreams. This mother was sure that her child would be a girl because her dreams were filled with dancing, quite different from her earlier pregnancy with a boy; she later gave birth to a girl.

One researcher tried to verify how frequently pregnant women correctly sensed the sex of their unborn child by asking her subjects about predictive dreams. She found that 50 percent of the expectant mothers whose dreams she investigated had accurately dreamed of the baby's sex. Since the chances of having a child of either sex are also fifty-fifty, these subjects — as a group — predicted no better than chance.

A few pregnant women, however, had highly prophetic dreams involving the details of their labor or delivery, such as going into labor early, the exact date of a premature labor, being put into a community labor room, the specific circumstances under which the waters broke, and so forth. It would seem that at least some women have a keen ability to anticipate their future.

Imagining your baby's face
"I'm having a sonogram. Instead of being cloudy, it's absolutely clear — like Kodak film, in color. I can see our baby girl, and she looks just like us. She has my eyes, all dark and sparkly, and my husband's cute little bow mouth. She is a mixture of us in miniature. It's so thrilling!"

Like most mothers-to-be, ths mom had been wondering what the baby would be and what it would look like. Dreams offer the chance to check out one's child in imagination. Studies show that pregnant women see their babies in about 15 percent of their dreams. Other researchers have reported an even greater number of baby dreams during the third trimester. Sometimes an expectant mother depicts the appearance of her child with surprising accuracy. Other mothers-to-be worry in their dreams that their child might inherit an undesirable characteristic. Pregnant women can take comfort in the fact that nightmares are typical during this time and rarely contain prophetic material.

Choosing your baby's name
Convinced that her unborn child was a boy, Bettine selected her favorite name: Benjamin. Her dreams thought otherwise. The night she had made her final decision, she dreamed she held her baby in her arms. Suddenly he spoke to her, saying, "Mommy, please don't name me Benjamin! Please!"

Needless to say, Bettine awoke somewhat shaken. When she eventually gave birth to a baby boy, she decided to call him Christopher instead. Although she still preferred the name Benjamin, she hesitated to go against such strongly expressed wishes, from wherever they derived.

Pregnant women spend many waking hours contemplating possible names for their babies. Harmonious fits to a last name are weighed as carefully as a child's future education. Family names and fashionable ones are tried on for sound. Meanwhile, in sleep, dreams suggest — and sometimes demand — other choices. In olden times American Indians regarded names given in a dream as having power. Today's parents, too, often find that names arising in a dream hold special resonance for them.

You're leading a cheer at a high school football game. You know you've had your baby, but you don't know where he is. Suddenly you remember: You left your baby at the gym!

Imagining the uncharted territory of birth and motherhood
"I am boarding a plane, going off to a foreign country somewhere. I am pregnant but not so much as I am now. I have a bad feeling, like I don't really want to go. I am not an exile. People are escorting me. I have to go, but it is not for long."

This mom's dream expresses an emotion women typically experience toward the end of gestation: reluctance to confront the unknown. For a first-time mother, giving birth is rather like a journey to a foreign country. Face to face with her own adventure, she has an important starring role, even though it is with reluctance, since she must go along. The fact that she knows she is "not in exile" in the dream and that the trip is "not for long" suggests that her attitude is basically positive and that she expects to return safely. Giving birth, in addition to being depicted as a journey or an important commitment, may be represented as traveling through tunnels and corridors or the bursting of great waters.

Waiting for your baby's arrival
"In the dream we had the baby two days ago. I have gone somewhere while my husband is taking care of the baby. He's taken it to a sporting event with a bunch of his buddies. I go to the football stadium. It is a beautiful, sunny day. There is a combination football and baseball game going on. One team wears bright red uniforms and the other yellow. I walk up the bleachers, and my husband tells me where the baby is. I look behind where there is a cabana-like arrangement with three babies. It is easy to pick out mine. It is time to feed the child, and so I nurse it. I think that I must ask my husband how the labor went. He comes in. The whole dream has a feeling of great happiness."

There is much symbolism in this involved dream, but the main points here are the sensation of joy at having finished childbirth and the complex game. This mom explained that she likes football and knows a lot about it. Baseball she sees as boring; it takes a long time before anything happens. Thus the combination is something with interesting elements but that requires a lot of waiting before there is any action — just as pregnancy does. The ball in the game probably represents the baby, whose motion will determine the end of the "waiting game." Being nine months pregnant, this mom expresses here a wish for her baby's arrival and the pleasure she anticipates. The game is not over, and the outcome remains unknown.

Taking responsibility as a parent
"I go into labor. I'm walking around the living room and I feel the baby's head come out. I reach down and pull it out — it's a little girl. The head is flesh and skin, but the body is just bones. I'm worried. This is not right. I blow on the baby or breathe on her, and she fills out to normal-looking. I'm still kind of concerned she will stay okay when I wake."

Although "blowing" or "breathing" on a newborn may be simple behavior, the important fact is that this mom took action in her dream. In so doing, she transformed the dream baby. Subsequently, she gave birth to her first child — a girl — in a short, six-hour delivery. Taking charge, having confidence in herself, and being in command may help a woman to cope with the job of giving birth to a child. If you are being threatened in a nightmare, you may find that instead of letting yourself be victimized, assertively reacting to the situation will make a profound difference. Not only will you feel better about your nightmare, you may actually help make your labor shorter and easier.

When short- and long-labor groups were asked about how assertive they were during nightmares, researchers found that there was a strong connection between the dream content and the length of labor. Among the women who had short labor, 94 percent had been assertive in at least one of their nightmares. Among the women who had long labor, only 30 percent had been assertive, whereas the remaining 70 percent allowed themselves to be victimized.The whole issue of taking action in nightmares is extremely important, especially to a pregnant woman, for whom a more active stance may be connected with shorter and easier labor.

Dreaming about your grandparents? Pending fatherhood can make you think about your family's roots. As a soon-to-be dad, your feelings of excitement, anticipation, anxiety, and worry may open a floodgate of dreams.
Here's something else your dreams might reveal: With all the attention centered on your wife and her bulging belly, you might feel left out.

Feeling left out
During the second trimester, an expectant father's dreams become more protective and nurturing. He may find himself thinking and dreaming about his family of origin. In other dreams, the expectant father might see himself being pregnant and giving birth. Although he recognizes his mate's unique role as childbearer, he wants to share in the pregnancy experience.

Expectant fathers often feel left out at this stage of their wife's pregnancy. More than half of subjects studied dreamed of being excluded and alone. Confiding troublesome dreams to one's mate can help men overcome feelings of loneliness and keep partners in touch, while trading happy dreams can increase confidence and intimacy.

Anticipating fatherhood
A father-to-be anticipates the birth of a child in his dreams just as his pregnant wife does. Often fathers dream of finding babies or of being given them, sometimes during elaborate ceremonies or rites. While a woman may be dreaming of the work involved in her forthcoming labor, her mate may be concentrating on dream celebrations of the baby's birth. Dreams of this kind indicate acceptance and valuing of the child whose arrival is imminent.

Keep track of your pregnancy dreams!
Print out multiple copies of this special journal page to record your dreams and what you think they mean.Later, take a look back over your journals and compare them to things that happened later in your pregnancy, during childbirth, or with your baby. What was your brain telling you?
Click here for a printable version of this diary.